Top Five Worst Things That Can Possibly Happen

5. The bin liner splits while you're emptying the bin
4. You make yourself a nice brew and then forget to drink it
3. You nip out in the car for two minutes and get back to find someone else parked in the space outside your house
2. You hear some Toploader on the radio
1. You're on the phone trying to renew your insurance and your perineum explodes